Witty Quotes

Le-am gasit cu ajutorul lui Stumble(i love stumble)

The real trouble with reality is that there's no background music
Everyone is entitled to be stupid, but some abuse the privilege.
War doesn't determine who's right. War determines who's left.
Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.
Sarcasm helps keep you from telling people what you really think of them.
If you think things can't get worse it's probably only because you lack sufficient imagination.
A train station is where the train stops. A bus station is where the bus stops. On my desk, I have a work station
Knowledge is realizing that the street is one-way, wisdom is looking both directions anyway
Parents spend the first part of our lives teaching us to walk and talk, and the rest of it telling us to sit down and shut up.
Advice for the day: If you have a headache, do what it says on the aspirin bottle: Take two, and KEEP AWAY FROM CHILDREN.
books have knowledge, knowledge is power, power corrupts, corruption is a crime, and crime doesn't pay..so if you keep reading, you'll go broke
Friendships last when each friend thinks he has a slight superiority over the other
Love is like pi - natural, irrational, and very important*
You can go anywhere you want if you look serious and carry a clipboard.
You never learn anything by doing it right.
It's amazing how nice people are to you when they know you're going away
Anyone who uses the phrase "easy as taking candy from a baby" has never tried taking candy from a baby.

In order to keep a true perspective of one's importance, everyone should have a dog that will worship him and a cat that will ignore him.
It may look like I'm doing nothing, but I'm actively waiting for my problems to go away
The old believe everything, the middle- aged suspect everything, the young know everything
Nothing needs reforming as much as other people's habits
I don't suffer from insanity. I enjoy every minute of it.
"One of the great things about books is sometimes there are some fantastic pictures." -George W. Bush
Few women admit their age. Few men act theirs.
When people talk to God, it's called prayer. When God talks back, it's called schizophrenia
There is a time and a place for everything, and it's called college
Life is a sexually transmitted disease with 100% mortality.(prea tare)